When Spring Becomes Mating Season...

Tis the season...It's Spring, and birds are chirping, pollen is flying, and exes are a'calling. Spring seems to be mating season for humans as well as our animal kingdom subjects. If your number has stayed the same, trust that old flames and even old sparks will be looking to re-ignite. Why? Beats the heck out of me! Maybe the warm(er) weather makes people remember good old times, or maybe folk want to make sure they have a boo to take to the annual 4th of July BBQ. So what do you do? Jump back into their arms or raise your arms?

1) Consider WHY they're calling
You two haven't spoken since '94. Where'd this sudden interest come from? Loneliness? Boredom? An excerpt from the season finale of "Scrubs" that reminded them of you? Did you two have a really good time before, and they were just reminiscing? Or are they realizing that they're getting older, need to settle down with SOMEONE, and you're the best candidate from their past? Be cautious when old flames call around the time of their birthdays; they may be going through their little black book looking for someone to wife up since they just turned 30 and have no new prospects for marriage. Or they may be getting pressure from their parents (and/or church congregation) to "find a nice girl/boy" and settle down. "What about ___? She/he was such a sweetheart." Don't let yourself end up just another part of someone's 3 year plan.

2) What was the reason you two lost touch in the first place?
Was there an earnest connection that may have come at the wrong time? Were you seeing someone back then who's now no longer in the picture? Or did he or she have some severe issues (throwing your phone out the window, hemming you up, or offering a wedding ring after the first date)? If there was a reason back then, will it happen again? People change, but some basic things stay the same. Make sure you're not walking right back into the same drama you ran from before.

3) Use Your Present Judgement
You may not be the same person you were 5-10 years ago. What made you compatible then may not work now. For many, dating in high school only really required good conversation and the newest pair of Jordans on your feet. Now, does he still only wear Jordans? Or can he put on a shirt and tie every now and then? Is she employed or still waiting on Prince Charming to take her out the hood? The thing that super-glued you two together may be the rubber that keeps you both apart. Treat this like a new dating prospect. Get to know them NOW without clinging to memories from BACK THEN. Hold them to the same standards you'd put on someone you met a few days ago who's trying to be a part of your life.

4) If You're Going to Proceed, Keep the Past in the Past
If you decide that that old flame could be your Olympic Torch, you are promising that any bad feelings or negative thoughts from your previous encounter will NOT show up in the present. You are forfeiting your right to throwing the reason you separated before in his/her face, making qualitative statements like "you always do that, remember back in 2001...", and you are not allowed to hold the past against them in any way. You are dating them for who they are now. I suggest you clear the air before you start to get serious, and throw all that out the window once and for all.

5) Don't Be Afraid to Say, "Hell Nah!"
I recently received a phone call from an ex who I hadn't spoken to in ages who asked if I ever thought about us. I told him no, and realized once he said he thought Andre 3000 was whack, that we could NEVER EVER be together. Realize that if you don't want to go there, you don't have to. You are allowed to have a nice conversation, get all nostalgic and misty-eyed, clear up past misunderstandings, and catch-up a bit. You can even do it over a bite to eat. Why not? It's all in the past. But if the other person wants to try again, feel free to say, "Hell nah!" You are not obligated to try again because of the history you two have. That ship may have sailed its course. The saying goes "Forward ever, backward never." Be honest and upfront. If that's not what you want, don't lead them on into thinking they've got their childhood sweetheart back. Have a good time and keep it moving.

If you really, really don't want to deal with this, you can always change your number.
Verizon always welcomes new customers. :)

Stay Blessed!

44 Random Things....

Every now and then, I get forwarded this lists...I doubt everyone will consider this BLOGWORTHY, but eh, what the heck. I'm cool. I'm interesting. So, here are my 44 random things. Feel free to cut & paste and send to your friends.

1. Do you like blue cheese?
Yes, but only with hot wings.

2. Have you ever been drunk?
Honestly, 2x. The first was an accident. The second...was an accident too. (How was I to know that Cosmos could do that to you? It's PINK!) Needless to say, I don't drink anymore.

3. Do you own a gun?
No. Don't want to be in a position to shoot anyone.

4. What flavor of Kool Aid was your favorite?
Classic...RED!

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments?
Nope. I don't worry unless they give me a reason to. Besides, I see a rheumatologist every month. She's like family.

6. What do you think of hot dogs?
I just wonder what part of the cow do they come from.

7. Favorite Christmas movie?
He-Man and She-Ra's Christmas...or all the claymation movies (Rudolph & the others)

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
Anything hot (I'm West Indian)

9. Can you do push ups?
Now, like 2. I used to be able to do like 15 when I was younger.

10. What's your favorite piece of jewelry?
These long earrings that I wear pretty often.


11. Favorite hobby?
Talking on the phone...other than that, I love reading. I'm a nerd.

12. Do you have A.D.D.?
Depends on what I'm doing, while I'm doing what I'm doing.

13. What's your favorite shoe?
My brown boots from Aldo...or my black & gold Guess pumps. Ooooh, I love shoes.

14. Middle name?
Tekeisha (A lil hood there.)

15. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment?
Maybe I should reconsider my opinions of the person I'm on the phone with; What am I doing this week; Why didn't my friend call me back?

16. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink?
Water, Redbull Cola, Rice Milk

17. Current worry?
Whether I over-think everything

18. Current hate right now?
People that get upset if you don't follow them on Twitter, but they NEVER update their status. Why would I want to follow you if you have nothing to say?

20. How did you bring in the New Year?
At the T-Pain/Lil Wayne Concert with my sister, Michelle, in Atlanta, GA. Gym Class Heroes and T-Pain killed it.

21. Where would you like to go?
Japan, Spain, and a warm beach with clear, waters.

22. Name three people who will complete this?
Not sure. Don't care.

23. Do you own slippers?
Yep. Yellow with ducks, and when you squeeze the duck on top it quacks. :)

24. What color shirt are you wearing right now?
Black.

25. Do you like sleeping on Satin Sheets?
I'm more concerned with the mattress.

26. Can you whistle?
Yes

27. Favorite color?
Green

28. Would you be a pirate?
Nope, I'd be a mermaid.

29. What songs do you sing in the shower?
Whatever comes to mind. The tub is my stage!

30. Favorite Girl's Name?
Nia = "Purpose" in Swahili

31. Favorite boy's name?
Don't have one. I'll let my husband choose the name for our son.

32. What's in your pocket right now?
My pajama pants don't have pockets

33. Last thing that made you laugh?
Obama's speech from yesterday. He's hilarious.

34. Best bed sheets as a child?
Rainbow Brite

35. Worst injury you've ever had as a child?
I skinned my knee sliding on my make-shift third base on my concrete front yard.

36. Do you love where you live?
Um, I love the people that live here.

37. Who is your loudest friend?
Define "loud;" Define "friend" because none of my friends are loud.

39. How many dogs do you have?
0

40. Does someone have a crush on you?
A few people, but probably not the people I want to have a crush on.

41. What is your favorite book?
The Alchemist by Paul Coelho

42. What is your favorite candy?
Fun Dip (dipping a sugar stick in flavored sugar.)

43. Favorite Sports Team?
Not the Knicks. If I stayed a Knicks fan after 1998, I'd have killed myself by now.

44. What song do you want played at your funeral?
"Heaven" by James Hall

Day 26 Album Release Party & DJ Kool Herc's Birthday Party

It's April 14th and drizzling. This is the day my homegirl, Rosie a.k.a. "BadAssBrunette" from DTF Radio hits me up on Twitter saying, "We've got places to be tonight. I'll text you so you know where we're going." This leads up to two events, one so-so event with a lot of familiar faces, and another super-cool birthday party that closed up the night with a BANG!

First stop, Day 26's album release event at the Ed Hardy Store.

A sista hit up the red carpet. It was too darn cold to be taking off my jacket, especially with a gig the next day. Can't afford to get sick. lol.


Rosie and I are welcomed to an open bar of Nuvo, and a decent crowd of people. The organization of the store wasn't the best for an event like this, and I kept envisioning people pocketing hats and swiping clothes from the store after this event. I run into my good friend Mr. Red from I.B. Concept Magazine (He did a feature on me a while back). After hearing him talk about a wedding ring he swears is in the shop (joking), I continue to mingle. I tap a familiar face, only to realize it's Miguel Perdomo, a Sean John model I'd met at an event a while back. He's cool peoples (and very handsome, I must say). It was nice to parle with him and another model named Zenel who's modeled for Tommy.



I also saw my friend Quantum Leap (dope rapper), my Soror Sandrine C. on her PR grind, Mimi (fashionista/creator of http://www.mimiphxafropuffzfumi.blogspot.com), Eddie Shades from Talk of NY, and several other folks that run things in their field of expertise. The crowd gets thick by 12am, and Dawn (the sole member of Danity Kane) shows up. She's cuter on TV. Day 26 got in rather late, as they're supposed to, I guess. Could have but didn't sweat getting pictures with them; left that to my homegirl Rosie. She got all the shots especially since she's interviewed them on DTF Radio (shoutout the VIP Pass Show). Well, that was it for Day 26. On to the next event.

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After grabbing a slice to eat just off West 3rd Street, we head to Sutra Lounge in Lower East Side, Manhattan for DJ Kool Herc's Birthday Party.

Sutra brings back memories to me; when I first started doing poetry, Culture Shock Mondays Open Mic was held here. To see it as a jumping party spot is amazing to me.

We walk inside and it's PACKED! The DJ line-up is crazy. DJ Evil Dee, DJ Scratch, DJ are all taking turns on the ones and twos. The birthday boy even got on the mic and turntables. It was great seeing him and several other Hip Hop Icons.






Ran into a few dancers I knew who were having their own private dance party in the middle of the dance floor. The event had such an old school vibe; it was excellent. Rosie and I hung out with DJ Scratch for the rest of the night. A real cool dude. We finally bounced at 2:30am, just as the crowd was starting to die down.

Nights like these make me remember what true Hip Hop was about...expression, love, and fun. From breakdancing to emceeing to graffiti, Hip Hop was always meant to be felt. I definitely felt the love that night at that party, more than I felt at the Day 26 event. The bougieness and 'exclusivity' can get tiring very quickly. DJ Kool Herc's party had no VIP section, no real dresscode, no red carpet, and the stars all realized they're actually REAL PEOPLE.

As I plan my birthday party for June 27th, I hope to have the same vibe for my special day.

----------
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DJ KOOL HERC
&
CONGRATS DAY 26 ON THE NEW ALBUM

Random Entertaining Photos

I know, I suck...

I haven't been keeping up with my blog, but I vow to be better.

Now, this blog is going to highlight the randomness of the streets and public transportation systems. Who says you have to pay for entertainment?

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This was outside the Bowling Green train station near my gym. Times are hard for everyone, even for guys that like to wear Panda suits. Whatever happened to the days of working for a lil extra cash?

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This is more like it. A GIFTED pianist in the West 4th Street train station. One question: How the heck did he get the piano down there???

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Driving in Queens, NY. I think it was a protest against the war, but I definitely was lost at first. Keep in mind, this is in front a shopping center with no funeral home in sight.

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Look who I stumbled upon preaching in downtown Houston, TX. And I thought they only existed on Fulton Street, Brooklyn and in Times Square.

Well don't want to kill you with too many photos. Just love the randomness. :)

New Poem: Untitled I

Words seep from my lips to your heart
My spirit speaks to your soul
Leaking secrets like faucets
We tell each other things that have never been told
Days feel like months
Months like years
They say absence makes the heart grow fonder
But distance forged the connection that's there
Sneaking peaks at photos stolen
From online albums
Studying the place where Cancers and Taureans peacefully intertwine
Yet and still
I hear the phrase I know so well
"It's not the right time"
You feel perfection should wait for stars to align
For sundials to linger on new marks
Wait for the beaches to be funneled empty of sand
My tears whisper on your bare chest
Saying I'll always be there
Ignoring the fear that creeps
Like shadows tiptoeing on windowsills
Ignoring the murmuring
Warning me to be trepidatious
When bartering lust for hopes of love
I'm scared I've already made you mine in my eyes
Claimed you like my birthright
Like we were meant to give birth to the right type of love
Built on friendship, honesty, pleasure, and trust
I'm here at the right time to show you how wrong
Every other female was for you
Willing to up my frequent flier miles for you
So we can be United
Through US Airways
Use Delta to change your perception of expressing emotion
Our love could span the world
It could be Continental
And I Amtrack-ing down all potential ways to keep
Our future together on the Frontier
You've become necessary to my day
Healthy like an apple a day
I need you like Centrum
You're complete to me
If only I could ingest you daily
This way you could stay a part of me
Time and space need to bend for destiny
While I don't know what you see
I see hour hands fluttering
Moving at light-speed during nights we speak
"The right time" is relative
If you see something worth cherishing
Grab hold before it perishes
Because everything has a beginning
And in this situation
You determine how this ends
The perfect blend of lovers and friends
While whispers of worries work their way into your heart
I hope you'll help me hinder their existence with kisses
Let me take them apart
What you name bad timing
I won't take as rejection
I hope this vision of near perfection
Is not just a mental projection
A figment of my imagination
Or an image to be cropped
Out of my mind
For now my watch has stopped
I'm living in the now
Time will tell us the future
Just don't let time dictate when or how.


Copyright 2009 Shanelle Gabriel
Not to be re-posted or printed without the permission of the author

Minister Farrakhan blasts Mike Wallace on 60 min

I do not believe in all of Farrakhan's teachings...But he definitely brought up some excellent points. I know I am late with this, but it's a great tongue-lashing to anyone who talks trash about the countries around them. America has had a holier-than-thou approach to the rest of the world. And with discussions on water-boarding and torture methods, this video is applicable today.

If You're Not Dolled Up, Will People Still Listen?

It's the end of rehearsal for a performance I and two other poets are doing at a local high school. We're performing some of the kids poetry from a friend's writing class, and it's run by theater folk. (Side-note: while many poets see aspects of theater in their performance, theater folk tend to be more 'technical' and dwell on how the two genres are soooo NOT alike.) We're there talking about what we'll wear to unify the show. Dark jeans, shoes, colored top. Fine.

So as I and the other 2 poets leave rehearsal, the female poet (Eboni) reveals to me that the head of the theater program said to her, "You should let your hair down and wear make-up because you're really such a pretty girl. Keep in mind, the boys here are used to seeing women a certain way, you know, from TV and videos. You should dress up, so at least if they don't catch your words, they'll still pay attention." Yes, Women's Liberation has come to this.

Now, it makes me go "Hmm," because I know I don't dress to turn on little boys in high school. My words work very well, and any rudeness is not tolerated. I come from a long line of women who strike fear in the hearts of children everywhere. Make-up or not, they are going to listen. But to suggest that the exterior be used in such a way shows the problem with what society deems as a "female performer." If you don't appeal to the lower regions of a man, can you be taken seriously? Can you be sure that you have their full attention? I know that we're a society that focuses on aesthetics, but is the message ignored if the messenger isn't bejeweled and glittering?

Makes me want to put on some Timbs, a tank top, some overalls and complete with boxers, 1992- TLC style. I'll wear that, jump on stage, and perform "A Message to My Girls" and see if anyone takes me seriously.